Wind Trails.

I hate it..I hate when this type of problem occured...I'm already totally sick of it!!

Hell I wish my memories does not EXIST AT ALL!Dump phone time,got new phone got new number just gives me goosebumps and i rather spend my time sleeping whole day whole night and be as rotten as a good for nothing DEAD MEAT!!

-Sleep-

Finally back from caroling,don't have enough sleep this morning,and woke up early to attend church service,sad isn't it?Once service end me and my mum and aunt shirley rush to kar pin coffee shop makan breakfast,ate quite much and arrived at MYC just in time while the others were walking,1st thing in the morning kena call tau ke soh again..T__T damn u Eric Gan!

1st place we went is Carevilla,then Fatimah hospital,both was ok though..then we had our lunch at Carevilla,ate one big bowl of homemade asam lemak laksa..gosh..it was marvellous,but i end up stomache..but i enjoyed it XP

Then we head to Kinta Medical Centre..well that place was kinda "Ulu" to me..kinda like an abandoned mansion..well during refreshment we had lucky draw,gratz shueh cheng for kena-ing tat T-shirt,but sad it's size does not suit you..was about to make the Nescafe 3 in 1 to recharge my energy..then in the end i decided to rather go home sleep earlier better..

Next and last spot is Pantai Hospital..that place was Ae Ok..and we are welcomed by lots of people..well that was good haha..we end at around 4.45pm and originally i thought of going to Jusco and walk walk awhile..but in the end i go back home..sorry yea irene?Don't marah ku~XP..ok that's for today.

Argh!!I cant sleep!!I hate when this happen !!HATE IT!!!T.T heart so pain now..hate la really..i need wake up 8am in the morning one arrr!!craap!things always wun work out so probably..life is really not like a bed of roses..and the part i hate the most is when its on tat side..oh crap..dark side light side which side?folow the good or the bad?whcih one!?i'd always close my eyes and think...ok isz not to be sensitive..dun think negative..positive!!I SAID POSITIVE..but in the end it came bak the square one..the more i think the more it hurts..cmon God just let me sleep please..~~T.T

well crap that out..aihz..i guess if can i wan post a private post..keep my feelings inside do hurts...its always hurts..OH CRAP JUST LET ME SLEEP LA CMON!

-lights off-

yea yea yea..and in the end i manage to blog bout YLDP...although it ended quite a couple of days ago..but anyway..it will be a very long post and i was lazy past few days to blog it..wadever..lets move on..ok..heres it..get urself prepare..for the most lamest post ever!!

9th DEC

Eugene Khoo was not having a good sleep and he slept at 4am in the morning and woke up at 9am in the morning..so when he woke up he crawled up like a snake..well..*CUT IT OUT* ok so i bath and packed my stuffs and it was a rush and i end up forgetting the bring along the most important tool which needed during the night..torchlight actually..anyway...jovan's mum came at 10am and picked me up and we had our breakfast together..abu thn i arrive at MYC at duno wat time i forgot ady..so we got into the van and the bb boys get into the CAR..yea..we reached tapah town in bout an hour time and we had our lunch at the mini KFC and our MR.president got his beloved car bang out the parking lot and stucked..well..the other boys helped out and he managed got his car back to position..ok NEXT we arrived at the campsite the first thing pop out from my mind is...oh my *****..this is a nice site and my freaking celcom no service..well tats not the worse..my phone's software crashed and it just came out from the kilang a few days ago and now rosak again WTH...aiya..forget it ba..so we put down our stuffz and we head for the registration and it was awesome i say..AWESOME..i end up in the same group wif raymond...wat la..2 years ago youthquake same group now also same..well..after ice breaking we put our stuffz at our tent and there goes my tent leader ERIC GAN...the insane one..ok forget bout it and tats off for the first day..

10th DEC

Second day of the camp and MR.Eugene here was NOT having a good nite rest and so are the others..the kongs woke up 3-4times while i woke up 2 times in the morning...so we end up roaming around the campsite 6 sumthing in the morning..ah...we had our breakfast and there goes our devotion..it was ok and it doesn't bother me much though..ok after that is session time..i joined the level 1 so i learn level 1 stuffz...the first thing we learned is DISC personality~oh well bla i lazy to elaborate wats it all bout..jus having a good time..then there goes on and other bla bla bla stuffz..team building..then free time...~~~

11th DEC

Third day of the camp and FINALLY i slept FULLY AND IT WAS GREATTT..as it goes..this time we ipoh fellas occupied the mp theater and we lepak there early in the morning...well...it was cold and i was shivering and so are the others..our Jovan keep waiting for his phone to work..due to the no-line area we were staying..argh...the session was WORST..i try to endure the boring-ness of it but in the end during the 10mins prayer i fall asleep..owww..soWEE!!! anyway after that was as usual ..team building and bla this time we have connecting time and we were ordered to so a chant for our team so i thought of one which is crappy...well u see...our team name was sapphire..so as i was mumbling...i end up spit out this "Sapphire Sapphire our ass is on fire,buy us a new attire and we shall hire u as our lier"...goshz..in the end we changed it to more religious type so..it was ae oK..and tat goes for the day..

12th DEC

Fourth day as usual early in the morning we ipoh fellas lepak at theater there again...miss annabelle and diana end up walking towards us like zombies and well i cant blame them..they are like zombies always ...ISZ..JOKING ONLY WEII..dun whack me XP...ok breakfast was kinda sucks..cause it was quite similar as the previous days..fried noodlees wif fish paste,cabbage and meat piece...aiya...complain so much for wat..can eat ma can d lor..Z.z..NEXT session was good...my devotion leader Jerrad Tan was leading the talk and we all enjoy it a lot..too bad after the talk he gtg bak to penang =(..nah oh well..after tat i kena disturb by anna again..sigh..sad casseee...well next...ah ya..the connecting time..it was sucks...suddenly our task were given and it was the one i hate the most..sketch...our title is selling aircons to eskimos...ahh crap..we sat there and talk talk talk and in the end we din do anything...aizzz...well..then the next is the 3 things we learn throughout the camp..aiz..these things all so susah..T.T..

13th DEC

One more day then so as usual..today was abit special..we will be having fun nite at 8pm and gratz to our team we din even prepare any of the task we were given yet..great..and during preparation time and we manage to get all done..and during fun nite..it was random...i mean random team perform..sigh..stupid king lawrence..T.T..made us perform the lousy chant..at least the sketch wat..we did tat well...theres all worse..aduh...ok the fun nite was great...we had our supper..which was cup noodles..and all along the nitez i kept drinking tea..oh yea~~tea is nice..good for health and pump me up..XD..nah oh well..then we were paksa to sleep T.T...ERIC STOP HUGGING ME XP..haha..well..forgot to mention bout him..he shout cause of coldness when ppl were lining up to use the tent site toilet..and all laughed..wat la..and..T.T..i call him tau ke soh..now i kena called tau ke soh..aduh...

14th DEC

ok today woke up early cause its the last day..went for wash up then last devotion and no session ! YAY~XP..well wat we did most was go around and get emails and contact from everyone lols..ah..and our transport came at 2 sumthing ++ and finally..GOD BLESS..we were heading bak to ipoh..walao talk bout tat..our van..really speeding man..we arrive at simpang pulai in bout 40mins time..tat was extremely godly FAST..WOOT..well..anyway..arrived at myc and jovan's mum came and im still phoneless..sigh..back home?bath..sit in front pc..add ppl's msn..and wala..end of story..

well sorry i simplify all..if i were to write all it will be damn damn damn longggggg untill i think my whole blog page will be occupied..sigh...will blog again..chaoz

finally and at last...i willing to write a post for my blog..aiz..this few days wat had i done..non at all..from 25th to 2nd of dec was like i chiong rappelz online..now.i stopped it..and wat fcking game i chiong?atlantica...oh well..damnit im addicted to it and i love it hell alot...i was able to reach lvl30 and learn most of the stuffs within 2 days..@@ ouch..u guys must be thinking this eugene khoo always keep ply ply ply ply...studies bad like hell..arghhh..><..well sometimes i kinda had myself and wat im doing ...

recent days behavior got me into a god damn big trouble...the worst thing ever...i had been sleeping at 5am for 1 whole week..and now im so freaking damn skinny..my eyes are like panda...and i jus went to have a facial yesterday afternoon...oh damn..easy to conclude is that now im totally..like..a freaking idiotic good for nothing panda zombie..@@!!ahh...i think i gota put a stop to this now..hell this is not working....i have camp and a trip to overseas to attend to...cant get myself look bad..@@..oh well..i guess tonite i wll just have to force myself to sleep at 12am...well gota do so...no matter wat..if not i also gota sleep by 2am..the most latest...sigh..

some of u guys would think..ahh u finaly realize it?its too late/well its not late yet...oh watever...jus freak me out..Z.Z...oh and the reason i finnaly willing to blog is because i was about to duck myself in the bed when i found out that my body is damn heating and damn sticky so in the end i took a bath and now im waiting for my hair to dry and my body is so damn cool~wakakakak...ahh..well..-_-..today is thursday ritee...well..WELCOME BAK TRIPLE Y/3Y/YIN YEE...missss eeuu so much!ZZZ...watever...if i found out no gifts then when i go taiwan it will aslo be da same wakakakak....|

ah and...finallyy..i said is FINALLYY..my phone is back..-___= after a week it went for a visit in the workshop..finaly its fix...damn tat guy said the software is bugged so now..its like pc reformat...all my contacts gone..aarrgghhh..i regret i din save it all into sim card when i have the chance to...now i gota retake all contact again...and some of em i even forgot their numbers...Z.z...oh well..i kinda feel my legs is pain now..probably i strained too much though...well..guess today i will sleep till quite late in the afternoon..so do understand me if any of u guys are finding me ya..-__-..and sorry to myself for sleeping so late!!WTF..zz|

ah well..its kinda rocks to blog using the small notebook.XP...hmm..i think my hair now is considered dried...well..time to sleep..-chaoz-

Bon voyage..en 3y..guess its too late ya?i've been dreaming too much recently..enjoy your holidays at hk ya..?well..i do love blogging on my bed...it have the comfortable feel..and a peaceful feel too..maybe..im just quite silly here...but..i do enjoy spending the holidays with u =) arigatou..^^ heh..i duno wherethe..hm..ntg..i guess in the end i have nothing to write though..=)

Before love says that love is, "Too heavy," rejects comprehension
And turns into hatred...

Just about everything is so, right?
Always covering them in situations of bad punishments, there's the reality of impostors
In the era of distorted dilemmas
Even we, who should have made a promise together, pass by each other without noticing

I abandoned the fact
That we destroyed each other and understood each other
Is this a wreck?
Don't acknowledge me; even when I confront it
I can't escape the images from when I fell

I'll find your eyes and the warmth of your hands
Time and time again

Just about everything is so, right?
Always covering them in situations of bad punishments, there's the reality of impostors
In the era of distorted dilemmas
Even we, who should have made a promise together, pass by each other without noticing

The city that won't change even if it's gone
Won't seek our salvation, right?
In the guise of someone honest
Everyone is inside of a crumbly crystal

Because I make more and more lies

Love only hurts me always...or so you whispered
You were scared of believing and cried, didn't you?
Learn your weaknesses and become strong, by believing without fear
You'll learn of true love, before it turns into hatred, right?

What I wanted
Isn't this heartless and contrived world
On the unviewable days without fragments of reason
Lowliness dwelt in my eyes that are tired of seeing

Lies that heal the heart- They exist
But it's a lie that will steal my heart, right?

Even if I'm to draw closer to love, I'll only be bitten...or so I whispered
I stopped believing and lived like that
With thoughts that I'm tired of even if I subsist off of despair
It's fine if I'm clinging onto a brief life

What I wanted
Isn't this heartless and contrived thing

A love lost in this city-
If I search for its meaning
I'll become a little better and be able to move on, right?

woohoo...yea its thursday dude...and yea the rain is surely damn cool rite~cool temp and everything~ hmmm..wat shld i say....today i woke up at 1.13pm..owww not that i wanted too,i set my alarm at 9am but in the end i off the alarm and i cont my sleep..crap crap crap crap~!!!!! hahahah~hmm tmr is the last day of skol ady..today when i go skol its EMPTY~~~!!!T>T....wan cry i alone only...damn sad can die..sigh...but anyway im at parade starbucks now..hmm...looking outside the glass which is raining sure does giv me a peaceful mind...hehe...well..jus done chit chating wif 3y...hm..holidays sure is boring though..when its school time,we always hope to have holidays,but nw when its holiday,we tend to hope tat its school time..haih...tats wat life is..well..im just a normal student wat...rite??

ok this yr is the most disgusting...i lost 3 dota matches and it surely does dropped my face damn hell a lot,and well,im not that sad or pissed off yea..cause theres always win and lose wat...i dun mind~~XD

hmmm3:50pm now..shld i go home or wat?but if i go home i also cant do anything useful and its damn borrrriiinnngggggg plying dota...dota dota dotttaaaa..im not a proroorororo..im just a newbieee..XP,well guess thats all for now,im being too crazy hahahaahaha...oh well..CHAOZ~!~

耳を澄ませば聞こえる
笑い声や涙音
皆生きてる、愛する君と
広い海を渡るには
一人じゃ迷ってしまう
一緒に行こう、光差す方へ
ぶつかってはまた抱き合って弱さ湧きあってく

永遠って言葉あるのかな
未来を思うと怖くなるけど
ずっと、ずっと続く夢があるから
手をつなごう

心が叫んでるのに
君は見て見ぬふりをして
前だけ向いて歩いて行くよ
写真の中笑う君今を描けていた

伝えるって事は難しいね
声をからしても届かなくて
ずっと、ずっと叫び続ける日もあるけど

思い重なり、花びら動き
巨大な力が生まれるから

永遠って言葉あるのかな
未来を思うと怖くなるけど
ずっと、ずっと続く夢があるからきっと
この空飛べたら会えるから
泣いてた自分と君に送るよ
ずっと、ずっと信じていれば叶うから
手をつなごう

Credits all to 絢香(Ayaka)!!

(as i write this post,i closed my eyes,it came out all from what im currently thinking)

chih..the title kinda over-bombastic..well anyway,LONG TIME ADD~..since the last time i do my job blogging in this marvelous and perfect blog of mine!!(ishz,puji till like tat..lameeee!)

well what had i done for all these days,final year exam over a week ago..and i get cocky results,well cut it out,im sick thinking of those anymore,its just giving me more stuffs for me to think,think think think~~sometime think too much do cause headache and stress huh...as i expected..this yr i lost all categories for my skol game competition,well who cares?^^ as long as im fine wif it,laugh all u wan,boast all u wan,i dun giv a damn anymore,heh im surely a sore loser...nah..i cant said its luck though,we the ones who believe in God dun believe in luck rite??yea..i stll rmb wat adrian told me after this trip to LA,hmm well lets see..hope u guys dun mind huh..i kinda just write wat im thinking..so the topic all will be kinda messed up.

wow im listening this song Daybreak's Bell by L'arc en Ciel,last time when i listen its kinda sucks,but after i finish watching Gundam 00 season 1,i love it!this song is just too emo and too cool and too meaningful!its 3 in 1!!ding..and i saw c h i o ki has jus signed in msn...-.-!!hell im too ridiculous!!!argh...so tired a..now its 7.45pm and hell im still having my school uniform on..dun mistaken a!not i dunwan to bath,its im so tired these few days,too much stress too much pressure,and when i go to skol its so empty tat it attracted us all to play traunt,today was like about 10 of us,when 9am we change our outfit into outdoor clothes,simple and nice,and we just walked out of the school gate,dun misunderstand,not that we are useless freaks,its just tat the school is near an Empty situtation..

haih,how i wish tat i can apologize to those i hurt or to those who dun like me or hate me or have conflicts wif me,although it's not a lot of em,but i prefer that everyone is my friends lols,who cares if i dun have a girl,who cares if i cant find one,as long that im not lonely enuf...i always wandered...am i one of the lonely ones..if yes..why i dun look like one,if no...why i feel like i am....chih..this sure is annoying..anyway gratz ansen for having a new girl,seems like u've been desperate for one and now u finally striked,haha

hmm well,this school holiday,i will be kinda busy compared to previous years,although i wun be organizing a birthday due to certain personal reasons,but i think i will be at malaysia to celebrate it wif my frens,cause the previous years i celebrate my bday in overseas countries like japan and australia,well its not that fun not having frens around and only my parents and a small cake...-_- well after a long time of dissapearance in church,seems like this year i joined to be a helper in HBC(Holiday Bible Camp),and also joined the yldp camp at tapah..haiuh...think liao also headache..so many camps..and also need go taiwan for this year 2008 family holiday trip,i dun think i will be enjoying myself in taiwan..i hate going to chinese country,i prefer japan,korea and europe,even thailand and other SEA countries i dun like,i just hate going to those ULU ULU countries,duno why i dun kinda like USA also..maybe its too..hmm..how to say...aiya duno la..but i like Uk more...and the most i like is Japan,anime anime anime~~~wee im addicted to it!=x

guess tats all for today..maybe next time when i have such "mood" to blog i will write more..altough this post is kinda crappy,but its my own like,chaoz

Lololol,funny sia,come back home,i heard ppl say that many ppl anti me,for wat reason?i also duno,maybe so hai reasons gua..

1st:wan anti me?come,as if i scare,bo song my dota team?come win me,if not,dun kpkb over there.

2nd:if u wan be childish,and still bo song i diu kao u last time?fuck it,because i dun even interested in remebering tat case now.

3rd:why must u guys threat this dota competition so damn fucking serious?only within school and also the prize is lapsap,i join is also for fun,need do till so many things say wan anti my team or bla bla bla bo?if wan do that then win me first la,kpkb over there can earn cash izit?one word to describe u all la,so hai + childish -.-_|_

when i finish downloaded EP 78-79,and the 1st time i listen to this song i can tell tat its da best Op of naruto series so far!although the full version isnt out yet..but heres the video and a download link of mp3 of it!enjoy ^^V

http://rapidshare.com/files/151298245/Shippuuden_Opening_4.mp3.html

Visions crowd my weary eyes,
Each, in truth, death in disguise.
Listen now to my weathered toungue,
And remember with me my years so young,
Playing wildly, the sun on my face,
When I stumbled upon your hiding place.
You showed to me your slender hand.
Time in an hour glass; but falling sand.
You smiled at me, and asked me "friend?"
We began something that would never end.
We played each day beneath bright sky.
How quickly life has passed me by.

On now to our teenage years,
Full of change, and full of fears.
That was when we first had kissed.
It is that day I've always missed,
For love is as the moon in pains,
For as it waxes, it also wanes.
We struggled so hard to understand,
And yet once more you showed your hand.
The hourglass was yet still full...
Grain by grain through tiny hole.

We skip ahead, my time is nigh,
The cherished love, now held so high.
We stand in white at church's gate,
Doves fly by, I've found my mate.
Rice is thrown and we dissapear,
Honeymooning for one full year.
We return with someone new,
from our love, our daughter grew.
We did our best to make her smile,
Though we were fighting all the while.
Even then, how I cherished you,
Sometimes love just can't show through.

The years roll on, she's all grown up,
She'll always be our little pup,
And how you wept that so-cruel day,
She's our daughter; now moved away.
In ripe age our fights now cease,
We live our days in dream-like peace.
Yet the sands grow smaller still,
And death creeps closer to his kill.

The winter had come all to fast,
We sat recalling our distant past.
The love still there in all we do,
In each thought, I thought of you.
The time had come and I grew ill,
The sand grew smaller, smaller still.

So here I wait in bed this day,
Death soon coming to take me away,
And still you extend to me your hand,
The time is slipping, falling sand.
I'll not regret the past we share.
Your hands so warm and full of care....
I feel so sad to see you weep,
Yet I depart, my final sleep.
I loved you till my final breath,
Even in the arms of death.

桜色舞うころ, 私はひとり
押さえきれぬ胸に 立ち尽くしてた

若葉色 萌ゆれば 想いあふれて
すべてを見失い あなたへ流れた

めぐる木々たちだけが
ふたりを見ていたの
ひとどころにはとどまれないと
そっとおしえながら

枯葉色 染めてく あなたのとなり
移るいゆく日々が 愛へと変るの

どうか木々たちだけは
この想いを守って
もう一度だけふたりの上で
そっと葉を揺らして

やがて季節はふたりを
どこへ運んでゆくの
ただひとつだけ 確かな今を
そっと抱きしめていた

雪化粧 まどえは 想いはぐれて
足跡も消してく 音無きいたずら

どうか木々たちだけは
この想いを守って
「永遠」の中ふたりとどめて
ここに 生き続けて

めぐる木々たちだけが
ふたりを見ていたの
ひとどころにはとどまれないと
そっとおしえながら

桜色舞うころ, 私はひとり
あなたへの想いを かみしめたまま

作詞: 川江美奈子 作曲: 川江美奈子

*howl* ..... am i a wolf or what..-_-?yawnzz...should i consider myself just woke up or what,nah...i shouldn't cause i din even sleep for the whole night again..thinking of that..i felt tat its stupid to do such action..Jeezz..well at first i thought of going to school,but in the end i've been invited by my fren to play traunt...came to think of it..i also din do so for quite some time though..so i just play for the whole night...and i just pretend sleepy and called my dad to come back home to fetch me to school so that i could run away before the prefects arrive for duties ya see..hmm..

well well...recently i kinda felt like quitting the life of a gamer though..playing games kinda made me feel bored now..and i kept on thinking wherethe if i will be able to do more useful stuffs than playing games man..well..exam fever will be starting soon..just a couple of days more..and its time to revise whole years work..and i just kinda worried...will i be able to make it this time??this sentence keep on stirring in my mind..*sigh*

everyone starting a new life lols..even jovan's life is changing too well..although hes kinda self-centered sometimes but..harmm..what can i do lols..sometimes i also kinda hate myself..ever since when..i started becoming an idiot who wears a mask in front of other people..well..before that i was just so emo and it makes everyone thinks that im so called Lan C..lols..now..thought of changing back to old ways..but of course..not academic/attitude la...is lifestyle..

jeez..its 5.26am..i think i'd better get going...gotta reach school by 6am..phewww.thats all for today..-_-..maybe i will continue tonight or some other day..

おはいよございます~!!hehe its 5.52am in the morning!yahoo,and im awaken..nah..actually is because i slept at 8pm yesterday..man i was so damn tired that after dinner,i straight went to bed and by the time i woke up is 4am!

so what had i done?Garena~~lols...played a round of DotA and then a few rounds of mini games..hmm the day was awesome though,planned to upload a few photos..but i lended yin yee my data transferer for my cell phone ..sigh..recently i was like quit-ted online gaming sia..not much nice game released recently though..cabal is hell boring..ragnarok online 2 was like also boring cause not much stuffs release yet..and granado espada was like..no $$=no gameplay zz...well..my room is well equipped now..its brings a real "teenage room" feeling after installing the furnitures lols..well i will take a couple of screenshots when i get my data transferer back this friday ^^V

Nyway its time to pack things upz and get ready to school!Wish that i have a nice dayye~!

拝啓
この手紙読んでいるあなたは
どこで何をしているのだろう

十五の僕にには誰にも話せない
悩みの種があるのです

未来の自分に宛てて書く手紙なら
きっと素直に打ち明けられるだろう

いま　負けそうで　泣きそうで
消えてしまいそうな僕は
誰の言葉を信じ歩けばいいの？
ひとつしかないこの胸が何度もばらばらに割れて
苦しい中で　今を生きている

拝啓
ありがとう　十五のあなたに
伝えたい事があるのです

自分とは何でどこへ向かうべきか
問い続ければ見えてくる

荒れた青春の海は厳しいけれど
明日の岸辺へと　夢の船よ進め

今　負けないで　泣かないで
消えてしまいそうな時は
自分の声を信じ歩けばいいの
大人の僕も傷ついて眠れない夜はあるけど
苦くて甘い今を生きている

人生の全てに意味があるから
恐れずにあなたの夢を育てて
Keep on believing

負けそうで　泣きそうで
消えてしまいそうな僕は
誰の言葉を信じ歩けばいいの？

ああ　負けないで　泣かないで
消えてしまいそうな時は
自分の声を信じ歩けばいいの

いつの時代も悲しみを避けては通れないけれど
笑顔を見せて　今を生きていこう
今を生きていこう

拝啓
この手紙読んでいるあなたが
幸せな事を願います

Haikei kono tegami yondeiru anata wa
Doko de nani wo shiteiru no darou

Juugo no boku ni wa dare ni mo hanasenai
Nayami no kanae ga aru no desu

Mirai no jibun ni atete kaku tegami nara
Kitto sunao ni uchiake rareru darou

Ima makesou de nakisou de
Kieteshimaisou na boku wa
Dare no kotoba wo
Shinji arukeba ii no?
Hitotsu shika nai kono mune ga nando mo barabara ni warete
Kurushii naka de ima wo ikiteiru
Ima wo ikiteiru

Haikei arigatou juugo no anata ni
Tsutaetai koto ga aru no desu
Jibun to wa nani de doko e mukau beki ka
Toitsu dzukereeba mietekuru

Areta seishun no umi wa kibishii keredo
Asu no kishibe e to yume no fune yo susume

Ima makenai de nakanai de
Kieteshimaisou na toki wa
Jibun no koe wo shinjiaru keba ii no?
Otona no boku mo kizutsuite
Nemurenai yoru wa aru kedo
Nigakute amai ima ikiteiru

Jinsei no subete ni imi ga aru kara
Osorezu ni anata no yume wo sodatete
La la la, la la la
Keep on believing
La la la, la la la,
Keep on believing, keep on believing, keep on believing

Makesou de nakisou de
Kieteshimaisou boku wa
Dare no kotoba wo shinji arukeba ii no?
Aa Makenaii de nakanai de
Kieteshimaisou na toki wa
Jibun no koe wo shinjiarukeba ii no
Itsu no jidai mo kanashimi mo
Sakete wa torenai keredo
Egao wo misete ima wo ikite yukou
Ima wo ikite yukou

Haikei kono tegami yondeiru anata ga
Shiawase na koto wo negaimasu

Dear you,
Who's reading this letter
Where are you and what are you doing now?

For me who's 15 years old
There are seeds of worries I can't tell anyone

If it's a letter addressed to my future self,
Surely I can confide truly to myself

Now, it seems that I'm about to be defeated and cry
For someone who's seemingly about to disappear
Whose words should I believe in?
This one-and-only heart has been broken so many times
In the midst of this pain, I live the present

Dear you,
Thank you
I have something to tell the 15-year-old you

If you continue asking what and where you should be going
You'll be able to see the answer

The rough seas of youth may be tough
But row your boat of dreams on
Towards the shores of tomorrow

Now, please don't be defeated and please don't shed a tear
During these times when you're seemingly about to disappear
Just believe in your own voice
For me as an adult, there are sleepless nights when I'm hurt
But I'm living the bittersweet present

There's meaning to everything in life
So build your dreams without fear
Keep on believing

Seems like I'm about to be defeated and cry
For someone who's seemingly about to disappear
Whose words should I believe in?

Please don't be defeated and please don't shed a tear
During these times when you're seemingly about to disappear
Just believe in your own voice

No matter era we're in
There's no running away from sorrow
So show your smile, and go on living the present
Go on living the present

Dear you,
Who's reading this letter
I wish you happiness

(All credits to Angela!)

ok today im totally busted up,crap?4 bad things happen on me straight this morning and now it makes me total stressed up!!

1st,i late to school,my and the first 3 student went to pull the grass,crap and its damn tiring and long,and my friend jovan?their group just walk around picking up some rubbish on the floor,and back to their position,and me?im still pulling the grass HELLL!!!

2nd:Absent.Hell yeah,mr.bala said im the undefeatable champion..champion of wat...absent..-_-do these teachers have to use such INTERESTING expression to describe me?one word FUCK tat idiot pineapple(form teacher,Cikgu Anas)jibai 2nd period suddenly call me to go field meet him,do wat?lecture me...-_-...1st i thought those things he said was real,actually he was fucking his own brain,he jibai thinks im a fool,fuck tell me i absent 21 days within 9 months can receive the 3rd warning letter,_|_ i went back to class check the rules book of our school...and FUCK!!there stated that a student will only receive the 3rd warning letter when he/she is absent more than 40 days without reason,tat na beh pineapple 1st thing in the morning make my day miserable already,talk shit over there

3rd:Mr.bala period...whats today lesson?Grammer..-_-..ok all along i dont do his work,so the english exercise book 1,2 and 3..i totally dun have 1 and 3,only have 2,and the 2 is a mix up of 1,2 and 3..and all along he wun check my book,so i just heck care,suddenly duno wat cb is wrong wif me..when he requested us to copy the questions on the board..i was dreaming...so he saw me and called up my name and ask me bring my good for nothing rojak exercise book for him to see,and HOHOHOHOHO,he reveal my deepest secrets,which he discribed in a way that i dun bother to do the homework he gave and also tat im hell no interested in his lessons,he was about to BREAK his limit then suddenly he cooled down..and he said he would give me a period of 2 weeks to RE complete the 3 books,and what was in my mind that time?"great..im totally busted"what can i do..at least better than nothing,so he wrote down in his record book and asked me to sign and bla bla..and that's off for this 3rd bad luck.

4th:Rubik cube..-_-..due to my success in finish the cube yesterday i was happy so i brought to school,well..i can turn fast..but must look at the formulas."sadded"well nvm,at least i look like a beginner..^^V..but...after english is chinese lesson..so in order to release my stress ,i just keep turn and turn the cube..and when i got to the last 4th step..suddenly my chinese teacher stood at the back of me and look at me,i was ashocked..but he smiled at me and just walk in the class,i was like phew..actually the cube is consider as illegal item in our school..well..during his lesson..ouchy..it was so damn hell boring..so what i do is do a few turns..suddenly he noticed that i was playing with the cube and he take the cane and came to my sitting place and i put up my hand and he caned me..then he continued his lesson..ZZZZ..FUCK LA!!from tat moment..i was thinking..wat the hell is wrong with me today..is like the whole world is trying to drive me to the wall..sigh..sadded totally..

jeez..idiotic...how i wish to become more idiotic than before....those memories,will nvr worth anything to me from now on...cheh...cant hold back my tears much though...

im really one lost young bird..
my eyes had been blindfolded..
i can't find the path of light..
all that's within me...despair..sadness..

perhaps if i brush away..
the thinking to get invovle in a relationship..
and get back to the life of a student..
isn't that wise...worse still..
i felt that myself is suck...

trying to act stupid..in order to cover up my emo-ness
every words that i spit out from my mouth..
doesn't really what i mean...
i acted lame,idiotic,cold joker..
and after that...i felt tat...i hate myself..

heh..wats the point being a famous gamer..
when u have nothing else to share with ur frens..
except games ,games and games...
Lord o Lord..when are u gona make me see while im blind now?
guess that would never happen..

as i fade away,i will not shed a single tear,
im willing to face the consequences for what i've done..
chih..idiotic..

Again,another sleepless night,
Loneliness filled the whole room,
I sat beside the window and looked out,
All i saw was a single lamp post,
Glowing in the dark.

I began to take a step into the past,
I wonder..what will happen,
if she's still with me?
What will happen,
if I changed long time ago?

Memories of the past,
starting to revolve in front of me,
allowing me to realize,
how foolish I was last time,
to throw her aside.

As I pray to the Lord,
I will never forget those who saved me,
those who loved me,those whom I wrong.
I will always live on..now and forever.

Alright heres it,12.40am and 1am is striking soon,and i just off my games,hell today is totally sickage...i do nothing in school,i crap in school,came home bath then tuition,then bla bla bla,during tuition,we tease tat kenny ong till jia lat,wakakakaka,sadded...ok after come back...my leg...i tell u..its terrible..its like i've been stressed up for thousand years...but ...i din go and rest..i was surfing through the net..and meanwhile tat..i practice my guitar ...and so i did this untill dinner time for i duno wat game i should play..sigh..but after dinner..i rather do some "waste time" stuffs...i went to gg(garena) and played several matches of FOC(Fight of charaters) man its was fun..XP..haha..and then..botz botz skyped me up and awhile later..i went into Vixen PW and helped him some quest..and wala..untill now..its bed time...tats all for an hour ago,bed time,-chaoz-

This is getting me nowhere...only driving me to the wall..-_-!
Freaking report of this month exam:
Bahasa Malaysia-52%(No comments,i deserve it..)
Bahasa Inggeris-82%(I wana go bang my head hardly on the wall,NOT SATISFIED!!)
Bahasa Cina-62%(Never study never do anything,and yet...)
Mathematics-72%(Just a coincident lady luck on my side)
Additional Mathematics-8%(HOLY SHIT F**K MY BRAIN)
Physics-33%(Yin+Yang)(No hope in this,i have no brains)
Biology-16(this one is pissing my mind off)
Chemistry-48%(wahoo,first time pass!)
Pendidikan Moral-19%(ok this one nothing to say,idiot teacher teaching=i get idiot marks)
Pendidikan Sivik-72%(shoot objectives questions)
EST(English Science & Tech)-72%(*NOT SATISFIED!!!*)
History-XX%(will be given tomorrow or maybe the day after tomorrow)

SO IN THE END,my conclusion is,i get some shitty results this month and im hell not satisfied with it!!!!!i felt that my freaking mid year exam is more better!F**K!

Wee this is my first video!enjoy it!Do drop ur comment on the tag box<<<

You had on the same smile
Even though the years have piled upon us
Impatient, we ignore the scenery passing by

Throw away your useless pride
Show kindness to the world

I gotta say
Even if we put on a courageous facade
We cannot live alone
The promise you made that day
Remains deep within my heart Even now

Partings and meetings
Finding light walking down new roads
Since the day we were born
This repetition has linked us together

When did you and I
Acquire such differing futures?

I gotta say
Even if we're far apart and never meet again
There is a strong bond between us
"Let my dreams come true"
I pray from the bottom of my heart
We're friends forever
Let's pledge to meet again
Swear on it
We're going to walk forward
Toward an unseen destination
Even if we're lost
We'll continue
No matter what

Amid the changing seasons
And the flow of time
Familiar melodies
Even when we grow old
They won't fade away
Our precious memories

I gotta say
Even if we put on a courageous facade
We cannot live alone
The promise you made that day
Remains deep within my heart

As life goes on...
Because we mustn't forget Yeah
Don't let it go...

This wide world or the people you hold dear


Note:All credits goes to Stephanie!

Will things ever change?Jeez...guess it won't...hell..im fevering and sneezing now..can get piss off damn easily..why i will get fevering and sneezing suddenly?simple..all is my own cause..-_-


this one nice...yesterday....went gunung rapat imax..with frens..kanasai...from 8pm until 4.30 am in the morning then walk back!damn morning environment damn nice o.O..sigh...walk back to my house a...DAMN LAMEE!!we took about 1 and half hours to reach home..and FUCK...im getting sicker and sicker as time passed...now..finally..sick liao..T.T!when we reached home..all of us was exhausted...i'm the only one perspiring profusely...cause i lack of exercise(sad isn't it?)...anyway...i took a few piece of pineapple..then..ZOM,onto the bed..and into the slumber i went..LOLS...and i woke up at 12.30pm in the afternoon..woke up..took my lunch..and waola~..tuition time..damn did a lot of work today...forcing myself to finish although im tired...and tats the time i started to feel shivering...zzz...untill now..sighh..-end-

I sat in my garden,reclined,
sipped a glass of lemon-tea,
with a cap over my eyes
to shield them from the morning sun.
I relived my life,bits and pieces,
all consumed with my thoughts.
And soon I drifted into a dream.
"LORD,"I ask,"I'm seventy,
what shall I do
for the rest of my life?"
He ponders and then tells me,
"Do what's good,
Do what's righteous,
And do what's holy."
In contemplation I say,
"But I've already done what I can."
"Then do more,"He says.
"And come to me.
Lean on me.
Learn from me."
"Will that get me to heaven?"I ask.
The LORD smiles.
"It depends,"He answers ever so softly,
Then He looks at me,His tender eyes meeting mine.
"Only if you're in my grace,"He says.
"Am I?"I ask,not knowing what to expect.
"You'll know -
You'll know-
when the time comes for you to know."
"That's fine.That's fine,"I say,
as I submit to the will of the LORD.
"What about my grandchildren?
What shall I teach them?"
And He tells me,
"Teach them to love their parents,
as much as they love them.
Teach them to love one another,
and to love everyone else."
"That's a lot of love,"I remark.
"Not quite,"He says.
"Most of all,teach them to love me
just as I love them."
"What else should I teach them?"
"Teach them to read the Bible,"He says,
and learn the lessons of life."
"What lessons,LORD?"I ask.
"The lessons I weave
into the lives of the characters
in the Holy Book.
The lessons of grief,pain,faith and hope-
the ups and downs of life;
and how to live throught it all."
"And what if they do wrong?"I ask.
"Tell them to ask me for forgiveness.
And I'll forgive them."
"Always?"I wonder.
"Not always.
Only when they truly repent."
The LORD goes on,
"Teach them to forgive those
who wrong them,
even as I forgive them,
and to forgive themselves,too."
Just as I was about to wake up,
the LORD says,rather amused,
"Wait!One last word.
When they grow up
and run the rat race,
tell them don't have to be a rat,
toiling the grinds of the day
and forget
the simple joys of living."
I grinned.God knows us well.
Then I got up,
and walked towards my door.
On it there was a plaque:
"My dear son,
You live in a world
measured in time.
In My world there is no time;
for My time is eternity.
And we never have to say goodbye."
Eternity reigns;
and we would live - forever.
Yesterday's sorrow;tomorrow's joy.

Extracted from "Healing Moments"

arh...as usual...its always sucks..staying at home is better than going to school...for there is nothing to do in school than chit-chatting here and there..-_-"

hmm...its still tuesday though...5 more mins to 12am..argh...when i recall back about what happened this morning..damn fucked up and stunned..@.@..i cant imagine this few days my english teacher likes to call my name to answer questions....fortunately i can answer...but the fuck he used me as experiment today..walao...i can't imagine that...when we discuss about the literature "the sound machine" he actually pinched my stomach and ask me got feel or not..fuck!and he pinched me 3 times,1st time..i was surprised..so i dont feel any pain,2nd time..no pain..3rd time is OWNAGE..i was like on cloud-9..jeezz...whole class laughed..and so am i...sigh~

tomorrow got his lessons again..argh..wonder whats going to happne..-_-~
chaoz..bedtime!

weehooO~finally i got this damn blog done XP...took me about 2-3 hours..@.@ sigh..~well..i do hope that i will be able to manage this blog well~fellow frens pls do drop some msg/comments for me and hope tat u all will help make my blog interesting~!XD